Love: Fully Known
Last week I shared the first of a three part series from a talk I gave two years ago. If you haven’t read it yet, go back here and give it a read as it sets the stage for what is written below. In it I share how one of the way God show’s his love to us is in His DELIGHT for you and for me.
Today’s truth is that we are fully known by Him. And that, dear friends, is such good news of great love!
*Reminder that I wrote this 2 years ago. So no, I am not currently pregnant!
“Did you just end up here on earth? Was it all an accident? The Bible says that it wasn’t a mistake or an accident. It was a plan. You didn’t just end up here. God put you here on purpose.
Do you hear the echoes of delight in those words? But his love doesn’t end with delight. Let’s keep reading as we make our second stop:
God wanted you here, and he had to have you here right now. Because he has a wonderful plan for you - something that only you can do. Every single thing about you - the colour of your eyes, your name, what you love, every day you will live - God knew before time began. Even before you were born, he loved you. You began in God’s heart. You are his. Made by Him. Made for Him.”
- On Purpose, pg 109 of “Thoughts to Make Your Heart Sing” by Sally Lloyd Jones
I am a mom. Elizabeth is a 2.5 yr old toddler full of spunk, energy, bravery, and determination. I am also a wife. Bob is a 29 year old entrepreneur full of spunk, energy, bravery, and determination. We have another little girl joining us in 4 short weeks, and the ultrasound technicians and doctors assure me she is active and determined to do what she wants.
You may notice that I am trying to retrain my brain towards a positive bent that builds up those I love. What I really want to scream from inside is this. I’m exhausted! Can’t they just slow down? I want to love them and be patient and kind, not irritable or resentful but they sure aren’t making it easy for me! Do they even see me? Do they know what I need? Why do I feel like I’m constantly giving?
And then I catch myself. Oh. Father, I don’t make it easy for you, do I? How many times am I the screaming toddler that you have to pick up once again and say “Anne, look at me. I see you. I know you. I love you.”
See, for the longest time I built my identity on false truths. If I am more patient with Elizabeth then I am a better mom and that will fill me. If I am grace-filled towards Bob then I am a better wife and that will fill me. If I can serve the perfect meal to friends, then I am a better homemaker and that will fill me. If I please this person then ______. If I do this job perfectly then _________. If …. And on it goes. Be good. Try harder. Do it better.
What is actually true is this: I am created in the image of God. I am created to worship and love him. I am beloved. Loved fully by the God of the universe.. He created me in this unique body with unique gifts and strengths. Yes, I am a mom and wife and homemaker and sister and daughter. But first and foremost. I am seen, known, and loved by Almighty God. That is who Anne is. I began in His heart. I am his. I am made by Him. Made for him.
Psalm 139: 1-6, 14-16
“O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar.
You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways.
Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.”
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of the them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.”
God digs you. When no one else notices you -- when no one else has the time to bother -- God searches you. You are endlessly, fascinatingly interesting to God. God doesn’t get tired of you. God searches you. God knows you. This is the God whose eye is on the sparrow. This is the God who keeps your tears in a bottle. This is the God who took out the divine knitting needles and crocheted you together, stitch by stitch, in your mother’s womb. How wonderful it is, when we do not even know ourselves, to be searched and known by God.
But how fearful a thing -- how fearful a thing to be searched and known by God. We want to be known, but do we want to be FULLY known. But this searching, all-knowing God won’t leave us alone. This God will not go away. There is no escape from this God. When the psalmist writes, “You hem me in” the psalmist means, “You besiege me; you surround me.”
How fearful a thing to be searched and known by this God. And yet how wonderful. Why wonderful? Because there is no more need to hide: all is accepted. You will be searched -- but nothing will be found within you that is not already known and embraced. When we surrender to the siege of being known, the result is a sweet one. For the God of unconditional surrender is the God of unconditional love. Fully seen. Fully known. Fully loved.
Are you willing to surrender to this being seen, known, and loved? It’s not a simple thing. It’s a daily surrender. It’s a daily willingness to fight against false truth and identity. It’s a daily choice to say “at the core of who I am is a woman created in the image of God, deeply loved by Him.” All else is secondary.
The psalmist ends 139 with this prayer of surrender. May it be our prayer:
“Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”
When I sit in this truth that I am seen, known, and loved, I see Him. My first love. He who is perfect love. He who died to prove that love. That brings us to our final stop in scripture.
Part 3 will be posted next Tuesday, February 9th as I explore Love: Sacrificed For
Elizabeth, one of the precious girls God knit together in my womb. Fully known by Him.